A New Life Plan

I decided I need to clarify what my priorities are in my new situation beholding to no one. First of all, I have to take care of business: Mom's estate, her accounts, propery and taxes. This includes filing insurance claims. So far, claims have been filed with five different insurors with more to be done. It is time-consuming and tedius, but I am motivated because I am looking for sufficient benefits that will tide me over until June when I will begin receiving Social Security Widow's benefits and begin monthly draw down on two annuity plans. Also lumped into this 'taking care of business' category is the writing of thank you notes to the dozens of sympathizers who reached out in very real ways during mother's brief hospitalization and subsequent death. I find I cannot dash through these notes. Each one is different and a genuine expression of my appreciation. It's a good day if I can write five of these.
My next major priority is to revise, expand and edit the collection of stories Mom wrote about her days in the American Red Cross stationed in Burma. A first draft in published form was produced by my son Aron five years ago with an online publishing website. The results were a smashing success, but there is a bit more work to be done adding a few stories and photos and making some minor edits that Mom wanted. The book is called "I was There: Memoirs of the forgotten theater of WWII--China-Burma-India." I have promised to complete the work by this summer when we make our pilgrimmage to Michigan to scatter her ashes in the presence of her immediate and extended family.
Priority number three involves my taking a few road trips over the next few months to visit specific friends and family. The first of these will be to Chattanooga in April to visit my friend Pam. I also plan to visit Arkansas, Iowa and Florida in the coming months. I hope to take a few other excursions for other purposes as well.
The fourth major priority is to continue work on my book about...my two extraordinary sons. More about that in future posts. I completed three chapters nearly 5 years ago, but had to put it aside while I was busy being a caregiver.
Another major priority is to find ways to be useful to others. I have volunteered to go on a mission trip in April to poor areas of the Cumberland Plateau near the Big South Fork area of Tennessee. This is an opportunity through my church where I will be helping to do home repairs. "Have toolbox will travel" type thing. I'm enjoying my renewed relationship with my church and have spoken to church leaders about improving disability access at the church.
The last priority on my list is home improvement: painting a room or two indoors and making some changes outside as well.
Well, so that's what I have on my list of priorities. I suppose I should write a mission statement to capture desired outcomes for my life. It could be as simple as, to be happy, be useful and to live within my means. :)

A New Life Begins

March 1, 2012: My world has changed completely and irrevocably from what it was a year ago....or even a month ago. Last spring, I was a fulltime caregiver for my 26 year old son with disabilities and for my then 93-year old mother. Now they are both gone....passed away.
Alex died unexpectedly after a seizure May 17 of last year and Mother died this February, also unexpectedly after falling. I had already lost my husband over five years ago and yes, that was unexpected as well. So, here I am, alone in this big house trying to tie up loose ends financially and otherwise. My closest blood relative, my son Aron, lives on the other side of the planet in Indonesia with a wife and toddler *smile*...my granddaughter Sofie. Life is very different and it feels weird to be so unfettered to anything or anybody. It's in my DNA to think positively about life changes, especially when they occur out of my control. Life happens and I just have to make the best of it. So, here I am less than a month into this uncharted world where I am beholding to no one and nothing, but my own conscience and my faith in God. I haven't held a paying job for five years and I have no desire or plans right now to find employment. I have other priorities and the good fortune to be able to live comfortably for now without income. Put that high on the list of blessings. I also have some very close friends who care about me and on whom I can lean in times of need. They're also just enjoyable to be around. They make me happy. I am finding comfort and support as well within my church family. I've always been a spiritual person, but not terribly religious. I am more so now simply because I can make church attendance, activities, and fellowship a priority. In my previous life as a double caregiver it was too overwhelming to place emphasis on church. Since Alex passed, I had genuinely enjoyed accompanying Mom to church. I like my church, the church leaders, and its mission "growing disciples of Christ by seeking God, sharing love, and serving others." (Pleased to say I just wrote that by heart. We say it aloud every Sunday. Good to be reminded what we're supposed to be about.) While I'm listing my blessings, I have to mention a few others....Dance. Stripped down to my core, I identify myself as a dancer. Dance for me is an expression of love (for beautiful music) and a form of worship of the Divine. I take a ballet class three mornings a week and it invigorates my body and restores my soul. There is much more for which I feel blessed, not the least of which is now freedom...freedom to allocate my time as I wish. That brings me to this blog, 'Dara Does Life'. My previous blog experiences were really travelogs in words and photos from my two trips to Indonesia. This new DDL blog is not really intended for any audience. It's really more for me. This will be my journey into a new life guided by a new life plan with priorities all my own. By journaling I hope my introspection will lead to insights and to inspiration that results in self improvement and, more importantly, in actions that benefit others.